What a blur...

The last week has been somewhat of a blur…

Friday morning I was in Eau Claire, WI, for my sister-in-law’s wedding.  My mom told me there wasn’t much I could do to help over the weekend, so I may as well continue with my plans.  My wife was already there, as she was the Maid of Honor and was also helping with last-minute preparations.  She had no easy way home as I had taken her there the previous weekend.  We ran a few errands, relaxed until the rehearsal.  Not being a part of the wedding party, I was just an observer.  After the rehearsal was the rehearsal dinner, and then we went to decorate the reception hall.  The reception was being held at a Knights of Columbus Hall, and as they had Bingo on Friday night, we weren’t able to get in until 9:30pm.  However, with most of the wedding party, their spouses, and some other family members helping, we were able to get the decorating finished rather quickly.

Saturday was the day of the wedding!  My sister-in-law’s fiancé had spent the night with a friend, as per the tradition of not seeing the bride on the wedding day before the wedding.  It ended up being my wife and I, the sister-in-law, and one of the bridesmaids in the house….I wish I could say it ended up like a story from penthouse magazine, but it was just another normal night!  The ladies left early Saturday morning to get their hair done, and then head to the church to get dressed.  I slept in, got ready, and headed to the church.  The ceremony went well, the ladies looked great, and the wedding party boarded a party bus for some outdoor pictures between the ceremony and the reception.  At the reception, I had decided not to drink much, even though we were staying at a hotel and I wasn’t driving.  I didn’t want to drink much due to having to get up early to get back home.  The pastor who was in charge of my dad’s funeral proceeding wanted to meet with the entire family, and they wanted me at my mom’s house at 1:30pm Sunday, which was a 6.5 hour drive from where we were at.  We had a lot of fun at the reception, I had a few drinks, and danced with my wife and some of the cute bridesmaids….I also had a couple of them hugging me many times throughout the evening, asking how I was doing, and thanking me for coming considering everything that was going on.  It wasn’t that me being there was anything special, but rather that I hadn’t asked my wife to leave and come home that they were really thanking me for…lol  We left the reception around 1:30am, and got to the hotel about 15 minutes later.  The hotel bar was open, and most of the wedding party was going there to continue the celebration.  My wife, who was quite drunk, wanted to go, but I didn’t.  I told her she could go, but I wanted her to see where our room was first, hoping she’d be able to go and make it back on her own.  We got into the room, and shortly after that she got sick and ended up not going to the hotel bar.  I got to bed around 3am, with the alarm clock set for 6am, hoping to be on the road by 6:30.

A few pics from the wedding:

The wedding party

The groom with the Maid of honor and bridesmaids

 My wife's side of the family that was there....The one with the mohawk is her cousin...lol

Sunday we were on our way by 6:40.  We made the long drive, stopping a couple of times for restroom breaks and lunch.  I got to my mom’s house around 1:20.  We talked with the pastor, he heard some interesting stories, and I found out a few things I didn’t know about my family, as well as how my parents met.  We stayed at the house pretty late, just spending time with my mom and the rest of the family.  My brother and his wife live in Texas, and we don’t see them often.  It was somewhat sad listening to my brother and sister tell stories of special times with my dad, vacations I missed out on due to working, etc., and not really having any special memories of good times with him aside from family vacations as a kid.  Being the oldest child, I missed out on a lot as I started working first and missed a the more fun vacations to the beaches and other good times.

Monday was the visitation….We arrived at the funeral home for the family viewing, and I looked at the flowers and stones that had been sent.  I always enjoy doing that, to see who sent what, just out of curiosity.  Among the arrangements sent were items from my co-workers.  I’ve only been at my job for 5 weeks, but they’ve made me feel very welcome, and the department I’m in is almost like a family environment.  I couldn’t have asked for anything better when looking for a job.  My brother and sister each had an arrangement from their employers, there were several from family, one from my parents’ insurance agent (who is also my insurance agent, and a friend from high school, whom I connected them with a few years ago to help them save money), and most shockingly, a beautiful plant from Lightning36!  While we have gotten to know each other better from our many times playing poker at the local casino, and spending a few days together in Vegas in December, I definitely hadn’t expected something like this….It was a very touching thing for him to do, and a gesture that I won’t forget.  The public visitation started at 4pm, and it was nice seeing the many family and friends who showed up to pay their respects, even though it was for such a sad occasion.  My supervisor from work came.  He brought with him a bible dedicated to my dad.  It was from the nuns who run the hospital that I work at.  It was a special gift that I will always treasure.  Then, as I was scouring the crowd, I saw Lightning36 there!  Not only had he taken the time and effort (as well as the money) to send a nice plant to the funeral home, but he had also shown up in person!  Again, it was something I won’t forget, something I most certainly didn’t expect.  Words can’t say how much I appreciated seeing him there, and how much it meant to me.  There was one person from my normal home poker game there, although since I hadn’t contacted any of them directly, and I’m only friends with a couple of them on facebook, I hadn’t really expected them there anyhow.  We got through the rest of the evening, and went to my mom’s house again.  She had so much food from people who had dropped by and prepared things for her, or picked something up for her, that we ate like kings!  We verified the times to be at the funeral the next day, and went home.

Tuesday was the funeral.  As my mom works at a school, and wanted to offer them the ability to be at the funeral if they so chose, it didn't start until 3:30pm.  It was a nice ceremony, and a last opportunity to see my dad before they closed the casket.  We made it through, and went to the cemetary for burial.  One thing that worked out was the location.  My parents didn't have their plots yet, but my mom was able to get plots very near my grandmother and grandfather (her parents), which is also in the area of my great grandparents on my mom's side (her dad's parents), as well as my uncle, who died at a young age in a car accident while driving drunk.  Afterwards, we went to have a dinner with those who wanted to celebrate my dad's life with us.  There was again more food than we could all eat even, and my mom asked everyone to take what they wanted for neighbors, co-workers, whatever, so she wouldn't have to deal with it all.

Wednesday we went to my mom's house for a long day of yard work.  It was beautiful outside.  We cut up tree limbs, tore down some fencing, pulled up fence posts, burned some tree branches and other brush, and got some of the dirt around the house ready to have grass seed planted in it.  We spent most of the day outside just doing whatever we could to help.  My cousin came by later in the afternoon.  He's a farmer, and brought a tractor to smooth out the new driveway they had just started filling in with asphalt.  While there, he pulled up a couple of tree stumps as well.  We managed to get quite a bit done.

Thursday I went back to work.  On my desk were 3 stones, along with a card signed by several co-workers.  More than I expected, and I wrote out a nice thank you note to express my gratitude and appreciation.  My supervisor asked if I was ready, saying I could take more time off if needed.  He told me not to worry about being new or anything else, but I was ready to be back.  The rest of the day Thursday and Friday were business as usual.  I know when I need something it will be a big adjustment, as I won't be able to ask my dad for help, but I will manage.

Picture of the garden? stones left for me at work.